duotoned

This blog does not have any kind of consistent theme other than text posts with me bitching about how hard it is being an adult.

sassydragon:

sassydragon:

but imagine if we had tiny little dragons

the size of puppies

and they would go wherever we went sitting on our shoulders and hissing at everyone who tried to touch you because you’re their most special thing in the universe and they are so tiny it’s ridiculously cute

the fact that this post has more notes than i ever expected makes me really glad 

t1m3l0rdh4nj1:

Having a pet is so weird. Like neither of you speak each other’s language and yet you form some strong bond by rubbing against each other and sleeping together and you might accidentally kick them in the face or step on their tail once in a while but at the end of the day you two are best buddies from entirely different species.

nicolascageholocaust:

We can only be friends if you’re kind of an asshole. Not full blown asshole because that’s no fun. And if you’re not an asshole at all then that won’t work either. A halfway asshole. Those are my kind of people.

jenny is in her room getting ready for work and i hear ”i can’t find a shirt but there are dildos everywhere”

bombing:

the reason this generation is failing is because we’re not motivated enough to make money. all the people on the dollar bills are dead. they’re not relevant and teens just can’t connect. we need money with memes and beyonce on it